updates

1. pretty sure I’m not pregnant. took a home test last week, negative. it was only at two weeks, though, so I’ll do another one this week just to be safe. hugely relieved. also – to be honest – a tiny bit disappointed. i really, really, don’t want a baby or another abortion, but maybe i’m a tad sad that i probably actually can’t. how fucked up is that.

2. saw the lad a second time. he walked in the door and just fucking seduced me. almost didn’t make it out of the doorway. wow. after, opened a bottle of wine but then decided to go out down the block and have a beer. nice to be out with him, nice to be seen (!) on the block with him. very, very nice to fuck him. in the morning, ended up in a crazy yoga sex position, my poor hip flexors but yeah. wow.

3. still seeing G. as well. i don’t know why it surprises me, but it does. he’s very sweet, considerate, always walks me downstairs to get a cab in the morning, loves showing off his new apartment stuff. last week, new paintings, he has good taste. easy enough i suppose when you have that kind of money. did i mention he spent 2.1 million on the apartment? cash? i’m surprised i care, but i do. lovely break of dawn morning sex too, I think the best to date with him, very relaxed and sexy.

4. still think i need to work out a girl date. i like these guys but i’m not having enough orgasms with them.

5. oh. fucked ex-boy again, this time at the river after our hosts went to bed. he’s seeing someone now, too. no idea why we keep doing this.