oh fuck I am now seeing a 31 yr old and a 27 yr old. and the 31 yr old thinks I shouldn’t be fucking anyone else. and he thinks I’m not. and he’s jealous.
I don’t want to be a bad person but there’s a part of me that truly loves them both. I told the beautiful boy last night that if only he was 20 yrs older I’d be in love with him. He stopped me and said 10. If we could cut it to 10…. sigh. But it’s 20 and that means there really is no future here. Frankly, ditto with Kyle. He’s not really going to want to be with me at 44 and 60, and so on.
oh dear what am I doing?
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