i may be done with J2. We have another date tomorrow, so I’ll reserve judgment, but it occurred to me yesterday that I’m already done. Sigh. I hate breaking up with people, I’m much better at wanting them to like me. We may have had the talk about how we’re not in a relationship, but I’m sensing he’s starting to reconsider that. Wish me luck, dear reader. I may need it.

washing up the kitchen, admittedly belatedly, had to move aside the champagne glasses from the tugboat crew to wash the teapot from new boy and put the water glass from b-boy in the dishwasher.

okay, yes, b-boy was in the hood tonight, and I needed to wash the memory of the new boy off of me. he came over all sweet and relatively sober, we had lovely slippery shower sex after he modeled his tighty whities from under his softball outfit.

he may not fuck me, but he’s definitely boy enough for me.

but earlier that night, at the bar, I got to spend a few minutes with coffee shop crush and his wife. okay, she’s cool and pretty and sweet. I guess if I can’t have him, I’m glad he’s at least with someone who might be worthy of him.

badannie is doing bootcamp. badannie’s ass is getting kicked.

I didn’t get my period. I spotted, a week early, and then when the time came, nothing. I’m not worried about being pregnant, I’ve been pregnant before and boy howdy there’s no mistaking it. No, I’m worried that even though last month was a bloodbath and I’ve had no other symptoms, maybe this is menopause. I’m probably over-reacting. Can I really be menopausal and still be fucking 25 yr olds? (oh god I didn’t know he was 25. I knew he was young, but 25? I’m so sorry. at least booty boy is over 30, and ex-boy is about to be…)

oh I did get the late-night booty call again and was bored enough to accept. but I think that’s gotta be it – second time not as good, and yeah, I really don’t actually like you. I tried to get in touch again a week later and first you ignored me, then you texted at 2 a.m. and didn’t even bother to come fuck me. so fuck you.

bad annie’s bad deed back in january? he turned 25 over the weekend. yipes.

really, is there anything better? you know each other’s needs so well and yet have so little left at stake. really good, really nice sex. i needed that! it’s right up there with first-time hottie sex.

yes, I thought he didn’t want me any more. yes, i was pissed at him. but what are my choices? stay mad or get laid? what do you think I chose?

oh yes, bad annie got laid all damn week.