No bullshit

How did I luck into this? G. takes me out, buys me dinner, drinks, fucks me, sets the alarm for whatever time I ask, fucks me again upon waking, is a perfect gentleman, walks me out to get a cab in the morning. All this, and a giant cock. BadAnnie = Happy. I occasionally wander into a fantasy where I become the girlfriend but honestly, why would I ruin such perfect arrangement?

I didn’t hear from the French boy-child for several days, thought he was somehow angry or distracted by a young girl, but it turns out he was just having phone problems. He leaves on Wednesday but has made plans with me for dinner on Tuesday. I’m touched he wants to spend his last night in NYC with me. Sweet boy.

Agreed to see K. today, went to brunch and movies. I really wanted to keep it an early night, first day back at work tomorrow and all, and told him so, but he insisted on coming back to my place anyway (he wanted to finish fixing the cabinet etc.), and then kind of got mad I didn’t want to sleep with him. Fuck that. Buh-bye.

no one said it would be ok

Let’s not forget that I was all alone tonight. Not single one of my friends, or the men I’ve been dating, called or texted to say happy new year. And as much I’d as I’d like to say that doesn’t matter, it does.

I could have easily been with either the French Boy or K. tonight but I chose not to. I’m still doing exactly what I didn’t want to be doing — playing social director for a bunch of people who couldn’t figure out how to make plans on their own — but the truth is, they are my peeps and I do love them all. And I just couldn’t be bothered to be on a date tonight, none of them are special enough and I did not want to send the wrong message. If I happen to pick up a date along the way of the evening, well, what can I say? it’s been that kind of year. But if not, I’m okay with ending the year alone, this time by choice. (although I will admit here, my admitting place, that I also chose not to change the sheets, instead just used my ironing spray, so I will sleep tonight amidst the scent of lavendar and young French boy… perchance to dream of love in the coming year. perhaps I am ready.)

too hard to keep finding the older post, so here’s the year-end total:

b-boy
ex-boy
new boy
J.
Creepy V.
J. & A.
E.
G.
K.
French Boy

BadAnnie finally picked up a boy in her coffee shop. I mean, I go there every day, but never once has anyone tried to pick me up — until last week. Adorable French boy, visiting his friend for the holidays. At first just sociable, they shared my table, made conversation. Came back the next day and he asked me to share again even though it wasn’t crowded – and on my way out, asked me out for a drink when we got back from Christmas. I knew better but said yes anyway, figuring he’d probably come to his senses over the weekend, but no, he texted me, and the night of the blizzard, we went to the Village to see music.

Kissed me in the bar — wow. He does this biting thing when kissing that is really hot. Impossible time getting back, he’s in ridiculous fashionable shoes in a blizzard, no cabs (not that they could drive anyway), finally got him on the subway home. He was a little sick and had been out in the blizzard, so I made tea, but we started fucking before we could drink it.

We started on the bed, he was surprised by my blow job skills, almost came right there but held back, got the condom on, got me up and fucked me in the kitchen. The kitchen? okay, whatever. From behind, with me leaning over the sink, but then (way cool), my arms on the counter behind me, my feet on the opposite counter in front of me, him in between. My trainer would be proud at the number of tricep dips I can do.

He’s passionate and romantic. Back on the bed, round two, he’s on top, one of my legs on his shoulder, in deep, and he gets this wicked little smile and says, if we weren’t using a condom he’s pretty sure he’d be impregnating me now. What American boy says that? It was truly intended as a loving remark, I didn’t feel the need to tell him I probably wasn’t getting pregnant anyway and in any case wouldn’t want to be…

Round three in the morning, he really wanted to come in my mouth, was surprised I encouraged him. Cleaned up and went back to the coffee shop, kind of glad my regular staffers weren’t there, the other one already a little scandalized.

He wanted to see me again in a day or two — I said sure, again figuring he’d probably back out, but he texted again to set it up. I backed out since he’d given me his cold and suggested we try the following night — again, for the third time, sure he would back out, but no…. we went bowling. It was fun, even if I’m still a little too injured to be sporting, and we came back here again. He really is very sweet.

Oh, and I’m going to hell for sure. He’s 24.

Nice date with G., as planned we ordered in thai food, watched a movie, fucked. Sex and affection are nice, but this isn’t love.

He’s going to spend christmas through new years in kent with his son – Bad Annie needs to look for another new year’s date. I’m okay with it, though; our relationship is nice, comfortable and without expectation. Guess it’ll stay that way.

I almost bought him a Christmas present. I couldn’t imagine that he planned to exchange gifts, but I got nervous. I brought a bottle of champagne and then chickened out on going to the store in Soho — and glad I did, there was absolutely no need.

He does have a giant cock. Not to mention the thickest one — feels amazing inside me. He’s so big, it’s practically heroic going down on him. Speaking of which, I have been maligning him, at least in my head, thinking that he never goes down on me. He did last night and I remembered he has before, just not every time. He’s not very good at it, but seriously, with that dick, who needs to be. He had some trouble staying hard, first time with me. I’m chalking it up to the wine. I didn’t think we drank that much – the champagne, and a bottle of Napa cab – but I’m a tad hungover this morning, so it must have been more than nothing. Still a fine, fuckable evening.

As usual when I’m with him, I didn’t check my phone/email even once until this morning. Funny he’s the only one who gets that respect/attention from me. Texts and email from K., probably wondering where I was. Yikes, gotta deal with that. Please tell me I’m not desperate enough to continue this just so I don’t spend New Year’s alone. Though as I write this, Trainer Girl just messaged me on OKC — maybe I’ll see what she’s up to. Doesn’t fucking a 28-year-old girl from New Jersey who just broke up with her boyfriend sound like a much better plan?

why am I suddenly thinking about love, though? is this just rebound emotions?